Sunday, August 5, 2012

My chicken sandwich theology

I have been feeling nudges from within to comment on the whole Chik-Fil-A debacle for the past week or so. I was afraid I wouldn’t be eloquent enough, and I have been praying about this a lot. I am truly disturbed by the Chik-Fil-A president’s statement that he is afraid of what God is going to think of our country when it permits same-sex marriages. Well, I am concerned about what God is thinking of people who claim to be Christians behaving in such a hateful and hurtful way. People seem to feel empowered to express their intolerance about the issue of same-sex marriage. It seems to me that in this age of political correctness, people somehow think it’s still OK to belittle and hate gay people. Our ancestors have disappointed God time and again with racial prejudice, and I believe today we are disappointing God with our bigotry toward our fellow Americans whose sexual orientation is different from the majority. Do I think that the legalization of same-sex marriages is going to bring down the wrath of God? No, I do not. I think He is far more unhappy about the hate that is being expressed in churches, in conversations, in lines at Chik-Fil-A. The topic in my Sunday School class today was “What Would Jesus Say to Our Nation Today?” The lesson focused on three points: justice, righteousness (meaning doing the right thing at the right time), and love. That lesson more than anything prompted me to stop thinking about it and to actually write this blog. I want to stand up for people who are under-represented and do the right thing NOW out of love. I have many gay and lesbian friends, and I believe with all my heart that God created them just the way he wanted them. I do not believe that our sexuality is a choice. We are who we are because God made us as we are. Yes, we can strive to be better people within, but some things are simply part of our DNA. If you have alienated yourself from gay people, then you are missing out on being with some of the most incredible people on this planet. Being gay is part of who my friends are, but it isn’t their sole identity. I love my gay friends because they are beautiful human beings with loving and giving souls. I wouldn’t change one thing about any of them, just like I don’t want to change my straight friends. God made each of us, and God doesn’t make mistakes. People like to point to a couple of scriptures and base all their hate and anger on a few words. If you ask me, the overarching message of the Bible is love. We are asked to love one another and to be kind. I look at all the crazy things going on in this world, and I don’t understand how people can point to same-sex marriage and say it is the one thing that is going to lead to the downfall of us as a people. All gay people want is the same thing the rest of us want: to make a lifetime commitment to the one person they love more than any other and to have all the legal rights and privileges that everyone else enjoys. It’s the antithesis of the “gay lifestyle” stereotype that too many people envision, of people flitting from one person to another with no real feelings. Plenty of straight people live that kind of life and yet there doesn’t seem to be a big uproar about that. Nor is there a big uproar about couples living together outside of wedlock, or people having affairs, or a whole lot of other choices people make. And in those cases, people are making choices; again, being gay is not a choice. I’m not saying we should judge the choices people make in their lives—that’s something between them and God. We all fall short of the perfection we have in Jesus Christ, and we are so blessed that our slate is wiped clean when we accept Jesus as our Savior. What I’m saying is, why are people focused on this one segment of the population? This isn’t even something they’re trying to force upon churches that do not want to allow gay weddings. No one is saying that has to happen. That whole argument about the definition of marriage doesn’t hold water, either. Straight people have been defiling what a marriage is supposed to be for decades. Many have gotten married for all the wrong reasons—reasons that have nothing to do with love and lifetime commitments, but here, we have a situation where two people of the same sex want to get married for all the right reasons. I strongly believe in the founding principle of separation of church and state. We are not supposed to force our religious beliefs on others. Isn’t this what all the clamor is about? People say same-sex marriage goes against their religious beliefs, so it just better not be legal. How ludicrous! We are not forced to attend a particular church, or any church at all, and yet a far-too-large segment of our population thinks that they have some right to force their beliefs on the entire country. The Bible is all about love: the love God has for us, the love we should have for Him and Jesus, and the love we have for one another. What I’m seeing is a spewing of hate that is reprehensible. It’s that hate that upsets God, I believe. Not only is it the hate itself, but it’s the fact that many gay and lesbian people are led to believe there is not a place for them with God. We as Christians are supposed to be disciples, bringing people to the Lord, but instead, far too many are embracing a message that says homosexuals are not worthy of God. None of us are worthy. It is only through God’s grace that any of us will find a home in heaven. But I will tell you this, when I am in heaven, I want my very dear gay and lesbian friends there with me. I don’t want them to feel that God has turned His back on them, because He hasn’t. People have turned their backs, or worse, gotten ugly about all of this. I’m here to tell you, though, that not all Christians feel that way. I hope and pray that my brothers and sisters of all sexual orientations can see through all the clamor and refuse to stereotype all Christians as close-minded, hate-mongers who abhor gay people. And don’t give me that “love the man, hate the sin” stuff. There is no way that the actions we have seen over the past couple of weeks is loving in any way. Besides, that saying carries so much judgment. Let’s just leave it at “love the man or woman.” We need to stand together and embrace one another as people of God. We are all human. We all have struggles, we all need God, we all need each other. My gay friends have been there for me during the lowest points of my life, showing me love and lifting me up as much as my straight friends, and I want them all to know that I am beside them now and always. My prayer is that we as a nation will begin the healing process and create an environment not of just tolerance or acceptance, but of love and understanding. That healing process begins one person at a time, and I want my gay friends to know that there is a place for you with God. I would be proud to sit with you in church. I want you to feel the unconditional love that God showers on me each and every day. I hope that God’s love shines through me and that you know that I see you as a very important part of the family of God—a wonderful creation of God—and that the world is a better place because you are in it.

9 comments:

  1. You are one of the most beautiful people I know, Nancy!

    ReplyDelete
  2. That was beautiful, Nancy. Thank you for expressing so eloquently exactly how I feel about this nonsense as well. I hope you don't mind if I share this post... it's worth sharing and reading, and like you, I hope people will pause and think on your words, and perhaps reflect on their own actions and make a change.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thanks, Nancy! Most well and beautifully said!

    Bill Ditewig

    ReplyDelete
  4. While I don't believe in a god, I respect others' beliefs and if I were to be a Christian I would believe in YOUR god, a god that doesn't condemn or hate and who doesn't want its followers to do so either. Thanks for the lovely post. Honestly, I was losing faith in the goodness of those that claim to be Christian due to all the ChikFilA-inspired hatred.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I've shared and re-read your piece several times today. I agree with every word you wrote. It's like we're going through civil rights issues, again, and it makes me so sad for our country. I can't believe how many friends I have who so adamantly do NOT agree with this, which makes me even more sad. I look at other countries who seem to be more evolved and wish we could have such open-mindedness here. I hope we do some day. Thank you for having the courage to speak up. It's very heartwarming.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Thanks. I agree that it's sad that far too many people are close-minded about this. Hopefully if enough people speak up, we will make a difference.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I commend you for standing up for what you believe in and the beautifully written post. I have shared it with many! Bradley is lucking to have you, but I just wish they wouldn't openly support and profit from an organization like Chick-fil-A. I hope BU wasn't the reason you took down your profile and picture.

    ReplyDelete