Self-improving

I'm still hanging in there with my diet and exercise. I brought in a bag of baby carrots today, and you'd think they were a bag of potato chips the way I've been snacking on them! I finally stopped when I realized that I'm really full!
I haven't weighed myself in about a week. I kept getting on the scales and weighing the same, even though I knew I'd been doing everything I should. I decided to focus on what I'm doing, not what I'm weighing. If I lead a healthy lifestyle, then losing weight will be a side effect. I need to focus on making the right choices and changing my lifestyle. That's what's critical, not what the scales say I weigh!
Keeping a positive attitude is so key to all of this. I was sick last weekend, and I ate a couple things that had been left from the holidays that I probably shouldn't have. On the other hand, I ate a lot of the right things: pears and bananas, broccoli, etc. The thing is, I like all these healthy things. It just means I need to go to the store more often to buy fresh produce.
Ever since my divorce, which happened at the same time my son went away to college, I go crazy in the grocery store and think, "I could make this," and "I can make that." In reality, when you're cooking for one, you just don't do it. I need to concentrate more on the fresh produce, the healthy snacks I can fix easily, because frankly, I don't want to go to a bunch of work for just me.
I also have started a little bit more cooking, then freezing foods like spaghetti sauce and chili. It's so nice knowing I have something I just have to heat up.
Most of all, I need to change my mindset. A trip to the grocery store has been a depressing reminder that I'm alone now. My focus now is to change my mindset and think of a trip to the grocery store as my chance to treat myself. I absolutely love the pears I've been getting lately, and I always enjoy bananas etc. I want to start enjoying a trip to the grocery store like I used to. Only this time, instead of thinking of things I can treat my family with, I am going to focus on me.
What is a treat for me? What's both easy and healthy that I'll enjoy preparing? Essentially, what foods can I eat that will make me not only feel good, but feel good about myself? I'm so glad fruits are "free" on Weight Watchers now. I can honestly say fruit is a fruit for me. I can't say the same for vegetables. I like them fine as part of a meal, or like these carrots I've been snacking on. But they're not a treat like fruit it.
I walked with a friend over the lunch hour today, and we were talking about how when you do one thing right, like exercise, then it makes you want to do other things right, like food choices. Somehow, these all work hand in hand. My friend wondered if it's because when you go to eat an M&M, you think about how much you'd have to do to work off just one M&M.
That's probably the case for some. But I think for me, exercising gives me a sense of accomplishment. It's not something I really like to do. I am doing it only because I know it's what I should do.
When I feel disciplined about exercise, then I feel more disciplined about food. It raises my self esteem. I don't turn to food for comfort. I think of it more as what fuel am I going to put into my body? That's very different from grabbing some chocolate because that will make me feel better for a few moments.
Of course, I want food to taste good. I think it's very important that we aren't choking down something we don't like, but rather savoring our food. I'm lucky. I really do enjoy fruits and vegetables. I just often haven't taken the time to go to the store, buy them, bring them home, and prepare them so they're easy to grab.
The thing is, I'm worth it! My health is worth it. I want to be around for many years to come, and I want to be able to enjoy life fully, just as I have up to now. I see myself slowing down, getting tired, not wanting to climb those steps, and I don't like it!
The thing is, I know that if I don't do something about my weight, I'm going to be having bad knees or hips or other things that make it even more difficult to lose weight. So before things go too far, it's time to stop, assess where I am, and start treating my body right.
I see many areas in my life where I need improvement. If I feel a sense of accomplishment with living a healthy lifestyle, I know I'll be ready to do other things to improve myself.
Maybe someday, I'll be writing self-improvement books!